Can I be honest enough and say I greatly dislike when people leave a church?  I'm not talking about moving to a different location, in that case your not leaving your church really, just the location of your church.  No I'm talking about when people stay in the same area,but decide they don't want to be a part of a church anymore.  It's not so much where they are  going to go from now on, it's mostly where they aren't going to be.  A church body is like a family, for me a very dear family.  So for me I always hate when it people leave "the family".  Technically, they aren't really leaving the family, but in reality they are.  Never or very seldom will be the occasions when you see their smiling faces Sunday morning worshipping God along side you, or giving an incite in discussion in a way that you never thought of before.   And there are the other traditions that you used to do together, but now that they are going to a different church they aren't apart of these special family traditions anymore, church camp out, picnics, Christmas caroling, sewing circle, and so many other things.  They have their own "family traditions"  now.  And for a long time in church it really feels like a very important part of you is missing. 

     Then there's the first time you see them, and...they've changed, drastically in no time at all. They look like totally different people. Suddenly you feel like you don't know them...You thought they weren't going to change somehow, or you hoped.  And you know you aren't perfect and they aren't perfect, and you know they are still going to Heaven,  but it hurts that you don't seem to be at the same place spiritually anymore.  Then you wander do you have it right or do they, your fairly convinced of your beliefs, but how could they be also so convinced of theirs, and do you talk about it or just go on like nothing has changed.  You still love them, but sometimes it seems like they don't love you anymore.  Some will go so far as to call you judgmental, legalistic, uninformed, or at the very worst deceitful all the while not thinking about how hurtful and judgemental they are being.  They loop you all together in one group by saying things about the church as a whole  (I'm not saying that all that leave a church do this, there are some who are very kind about leaving, but for those that do the hurt is so much more potent) You wander if you hurt them and that's why they are leaving, you wander if they still want your friendship, as you know you want theirs, you wander so many things.

       You don't judge them for leaving it just makes me sad and it makes you worry.  I've seen the latter too many times, for me not to wander about that.  There's all the yucky feelings that go around, the sickening gossip, and hurtful words.  Blaghh!

     So you mourn the loss, shed lot's of tears, and try to surrender them into the Lord's almighty hands, and hope that they know that you still love them...even though you hate when people leave a church, especially if it's your church...and no matter how nice they are about leaving it still hurts and you still don't likit feels like they are leaving you,  ...even if they are not that's just what it feels like.

  So no offense and no judgement is meant to be insinuated by this post.  It's just me being my "say it as it is" self...I just hate when people leave a church...especially when it's your own church...

                  Ok so it's late at night and I am waiting for my bread to rise, so in the meantime I decided to play this little game.  I have numbered all the pics and for those of you who would like to try to guess which of these pics is Marcus and which is Jenson.  Whoever gets the most right will win the grand prize of well...I haven't figured that out yet, maybe a Christmas present from yours truly,...

Rules

-You may not look at my photo log or facebook photos because that would be cheating. 

-Grandma and Grandpa's and the rest of you kin you may not look at your own photos to decide who is who.

-No looking at others comments to before you make your own comment. 

Let the game begin....

 1      

  2. 

 3.

4.

 5.  

 

 

 6. 

7.

8.

 

                                                                   

  9. 

10.

11. 

12. 

    13.  

 14. 

15.

16.

17.

18.

a little clip of our sweet babe

 

This post is a long time in the making...not really due to anything recent that has happened in anyway.  Just that I finally have time to sit down and post.  This is something that I feel the Lord has placed on my heart for some time.   It comes from the realization of a certain group of hurting people in our Christian circles today, and my questions about why it happens so frequently and without question...I've entitled this post.

Brother Bashing

     It happens all the time, starting with the following scenario.  A bunch of single girls get together and they start talking, a lot of it is innocent and fun, but then they start talking about guys.  Evaluations begin, conclusions drawn about their character, comments about their hygiene, misreading their intentions,,  looks or lack thereof, and anything else that comes to mind.  I must confess as a young girl especially, I joined in far to frequently to these conversations.  Not until the past years have I realized how truly damaging these discussions can be.  I am amazed how that things we would never say about other gals seem to be labeled "ok to discuss"  when it comes to guys.  When I think back to times I have participated in this I wander so many things.

      Why did we not consider this gossip?

      Did we think none of the guys would ever find out the things we said with a whole group of gals?

     Were we unaware how hurtful the things we were saying could be not only if this guy, God forbid, ever heard about our discussions, but also to this poor guys character and good name?

     Why do we think it's "ok" to say such discouraging things about a brother in Christ, a fellow follower of Jesus, even if there is a slight bit of truth attached to this form of cruelty?  Is it every right to emphasize another's faults?  What if this poor brother is working hard to overcome, and even if he's not what good does it do to discuss his faults?

      This awful form of gossip has been the ruin of far too many guys.  To many times they at least hear hints of the conversation, or feel the cold hand of rejection from girls that have been unduly influenced in their opinion of him.  It's bad enough if they feel this rejection by their peers, but feeling from the opposite sex is even more painful and damaging.   In some guys that I know this has influenced them to turn away from their faith in God.  How horrible how terrible to think that the words that I have chosen to say could cause such repercussions!  I think if us girls had any idea at all of the damage of our words and evaluations we would never go there.  We would know this should never happen in groups of girls that are followers of Jesus who are seeking  to have the law of kindness to be the constant guide of their tongue. 

      I've thought of all the why's.  Why certain guys fall prey to this kind of slander, and have concluded there is no reason good enough.  As a single gal it was used to often for myself as a defense mechanism against getting labeled with certain guys as a couple.  But as I think back, I am ashamed at the pride and selfishness of  saying things like, "Ewww," or "I don't think so", or shuttering when the name of a guy that I was not interested in was coupled with my own.  How prideful of me to think I was so much better then this guy, or to act like I was, and how selfish not to think of how hurtful that would be if he saw or was told in anyway about my response.  Surely, I could have kinder in my response.  I think there are a lot kinder ways to let a guy know you are not interested. 

      Before I went to SMBI, I was encouraged by a book I read to see all men as my brothers in Christ.  It helped me so much in my time there.  I have tried to use this as a guiding light since then as well and have found it to be very helpful in my relationship with men.  I have not always done this successfully.  However, I have found when I have used this as a guide, I have prevented a lot of hurt all the way around.  Yes, there were those times I had to tell a guy that I was not interested in dating him. Times that he mistook my kindness for something more. But I hope I have managed to do this with graciousness and kindness,  treating him like an equal and not like some alien from outer space.  I never enjoyed these awkward situations in the least, but I would go through them again if it meant protecting a guy from great hurt or embarrassment or slandering his good name.

      So I hope this has been an encouragement to you gals out there.  To treat the men in your life as brothers in Christ.  To have the law of kindness be your tongue's guide.  I hope to hear some input from you men and women out there.

     Had a wonderful mother's day.  I wanted to be with my own mother but my hubby made it special anyway.  Saturday, Justin made a washline for me for mother's day gift.  Yesterday, he made lunch for me all by himself, he did not let me help.  Then it was a sweet card from both of my boys, (which was the best part my love language is words of affirmation)  And another gift!! I got to talk to my dear friend on skype and my brother's who I haven't talked to for ages, and my mom on the phone.  The end of the day was spent sharing memories of my mom at church.  Maybe I'll post some of them.  Then we had family over in the evening and talked and talked and talked I love talking   Thanks to everyone who made it so special!  Love you mom your the best! 

"Our paper here, the Toronto Star, has a front page article on a study on morning sickness and how mothers who have it in their pregnancy have children with higher IQ levels. It even says the worse the morning sickness the bigger the jump...so your children need to rise up and call you bless-ed I think, if my memory serves me correctly! This mothers day you need breakfast in bed, flowers and many declarations of thankfulness from your children since you went through much so they could be so smart. "

     Isn't this a wonderful redeeming quality of morning sickness?  Got this little excerpt from Life in the Shoes website by the way.    I gotta tell you it made me smile, a lot, and I can hope it's true, right?

     Most of you know that with both of my pregnancies.  I have experienced severe morning sickness.  Fortunately this second one hasn't been as bad, unless I stop taking my medication.  I keep trying hoping that since I'm over six months pregnant by now that  the morning sickness will be all gone.  I have learned many things that actually help my morning sickness and it does not include any of the following...

-ginger

-vitamin B6

-raspberry

-coffee

 -raw potatoes   (no dad they don't help)

-organic foods

 Or any other such remedies.  What does help is a tiny little pill called zofran, (which thankfully is way cheaper this time since it's not so new), eating small portions every one to two hours, eating before you get up in the morning--slowly.

     I've kind of adopted this morning schedule which includes.  Waking up when my husband leaves for work (I pack his lunch the night before, so I don't have to do that in the morning.  I take my medication, then Justin bless his heart brings me a fruit pop every morning.  Now there's nothing magical about a fruit pop except for the fact that it is something that goes down, slowly and the only thing I can stomach in the morning.  Just so you know I get the ones made from real fruit.  So I'm not just eating sugar in the morning. Then here comes a key.  I try to lie as still as possible while I digest.  If I throw-up after this process it's for sure certain that I'll be sick all day. I try to rest for at least a half an hour before I get up to have a bowl of cereal.  The rest of the day it's eat every two hours.  If I do all these things I can live a pretty much normal life.  Anyway, just thought Id share this as a help to anyone who has morning sickness.  And smart or not the reward is well worth the effort

Here's a video clip of my smart little boy He loves to sing in the mornings especially.  Must be related to my dad.

Quote from my mom.-"If men got morning sickness then we would have had a cure a long time ago." 

   Jenson you have brought so much joy and laughter to this home.  You are truly a blessing from God and we love you so much!  Can't hardly believe you are 2 years old already! 

Love you muchly,

Your mommy and daddy!

We anxiously awaited your arrival!

Your first picture.

Your daddy takes such good care of you and he loves you so much!

So does your mommy!

 

Such a big boy!  We love you Jenson!  (Pooh outfit and bear complimants of a spring yardsale, I love yardsales)

     Yes we are running into a storage crisis in the Nice household.  Anyone have any bright ideas how to organize baby clothes when your basically running out of storage areas.  Not sure if I should go through and get rid of some of them that I hardly wore on Jenson.  It's time to organize his room for the new baby.  Is it all right to start your spring cleaning in February?  This post is going to be really weird and random by the way. In case you haven't already  noticed.  Anyway, I tell you some days you feel like you might really have this motherhood thing a little bit figured out. Other days you wander who you are and what your really doing.  Btw, I figured out that my little boy is not trying to say Donna, but rather mama, it just comes out in a "Nana" because he has a little trouble with his Ms. 

     Ok, so I love, love, love, talking with other mom's though hashing out problems and getting good ideas, and you know just talking about it and getting a little sympathy from someone whose been there and done that.  So let's have a chat's to all you former mom's now mom's and those that will make good mom's some day.  Your all welcome to my little chat.  Here goes I'm going to give a few little things that have helped me with cleaning, being a mommy, etc.  And I want at least one little word of advise from all the rest of you out there.  Please!!! Just think of all the good advise we could have in one xanga post.  Here's a few little things I have learned.

1. Personal devotions (tough as it may be) is still of the utmost importance, make the time for it.

2. Bath time is a great time to clean the bathroom, or at least get a good start.

3. Fold wash on the bed that way you can't go to bed that night without putting away clothes.

4.  Find the humor in the little things, it helps to keep you smiling.

      I could maybe think of some more, but I really want to hear from all you....hears your chance to share the things you've learned.

It's really hard to post on xanga if you wait too long to post on xanga.  The more time that goes by the more you have to post and the more you don't know where or when to start. So maybe if I leave you with a list of things that have been happening in our lives that will suffice then next time maybe it will be easier to start.

1.  We are expecting July 25th another precious little one is due to arrive.  We are so excited and thankful to God for this wonderful gift.

2.  We had a wonderful Christmas in DE!  Was so good to be home again.

3.  Yes I am sick this pregnancy.  Please don't ask me to compare it to the last time.  All I know is I fight nausea every day.  I'm thinking it's not as bad this time.  But nine months of this looks big.

4.  Justin's brother Trevor and his wife Angie are here and we have been having a blast with them.  Wish they didn't have to leave.  It's so nice having them close by. 

5.  We spent a wonderful weekend together near Sisters, Oregon.  Twas great fun!

6. Jenson's vocabulary grows every day.  He loves to try to count with me or try to say his abc's.  He also loves "choo choo trains", "ars" (cars) and people.  Especially his Grandma's and Grandpa's and aunts and uncles.  He is such a dear, we love him so much

7.  Justin is working hard, which we are all thankful for the work that he still has.  He continues to be a wonderful husband and father.  I thank God for him everyday.\

8.  Me I'm doing as well as a sick prego mommy of two can be doing.    

9. On a side note...After a year of trying to diet and exercise in order to lose weight I've discovered the ultimate weight loss solution-- Pregnancy, after 3 months of pregnancy I've managed to lose almost 20lbs.  Needless to say my doctor doesn't share my joy.

I did it.  I actually sat down and wrote a xanga post wooohoo!

     Am I unique in this problem or have any others of you faced the same thing?  My little by calls me "donna".!   I'm not sure where he got it, but I noticed it after my brotherTrevor was here for a month.  Now maybe some of you have some incite in how to get mommy in his brain and donna out of it.  Sometimes he calls me mommy, but more often then not it's donna.  Can't figure out if it's more easier to say or what?  Any ideas?